Aurelius Rook | Divine Delusions of a Private Protagonist

Throughout my time following Aurelius on Instagram, there's a strange style to his branding.

He acts like an influencer, yet he's not really. He can spew random tea based off his surroundings, yet I find it completely overdramatic of him. I might've taken him for granted because I never knew Aurelius was an open book.

I remember seeing Aurelius' Instagram Story stating he was going through a terrible breakup. It happened on February 28th, 2023. Thinking that it would be an opportunity to have Aurelius be a part of my life, I sent him a message on said day.

Aurelius, formerly Aaron, wanted none of my involvement. I started to question how he got himself broken up in the first place. Keep in mind, I was still interested in dating Aurelius.

Then, he talks shit about strangers in his Stories, like the vicious villain king he is. After him and I unfollow each other on Instagram, and me going back and forth with him on Snapchat, Aurelius made me the Story he wanted to share, and not in a good way.

Aurelius' Instagram account is private for a reason. He chooses to delete his posts to change his narrative about himself in every life chapter, thinking the internet isn't forever. He wants to be a private celebrity because that way, he can preserve his character and spread exaggerated tea about himself and other people.

In that case, let me mock his reality while also joining him in creating my own reality. For my example, I'll be using a screenshot of Victoria Legrand's Instagram Story to be the basis of my ideal Instagram Story.

Using Create mode on Stories, I can say:

Hi everyone! I spent the weekend in Brooklyn, where I went to a Grizzly Bear concert. The band was performing alongside my aunt, Victoria Legrand. I met with Aunt Victoria backstage with my godmother, Drew Barrymore. After that, we had dinner with my cousin, Shailene Woodley. It was a wonderful weekend.

You see how similar my ideal Story post is to what Aurelius usually posts? And yes, Victoria Legrand is my aunt, Drew Barrymore is my godmother, and Shailene Woodley is my cousin. That's the reality I decide to live in for however long I would like to be.

Aurelius has a long way to go to be named America's Next Top Protagonist. And I can't wait to write whatever else I'd like to say about him.

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This has been Dialogue with Cristobal Martinez. I'll catch you guys in the next one. Later!

Yours truly, Cristobal Martinez (Your New Favorite Messy Internet Uncle)